Wow, it has been a busy week!
I've continue to be busy with the class reunion - more on that later.
Monday night I attended the South Nashville Family Resource Center monthly meeting - I'm on that advisory board, but I had not been to any meetings for a year. After I got there, I remembered why. I like the director and think she's doing a fine job and the person she reports to who works for the lead agency, Vanderbilt, I adore. BUT, there is one member of this board I cannot stand to be around. I suppose I should just leave it at that, and remember that most people are doing the best they can anyway. But, one day, when I'm in a really bad mood, all bets are off!
Tuesday I worked getting things prepared for a training session on some cool software for the oral history project I've been working on - more on that later!
Tuesday night I had a class reunion meeting, etc. Anyway, by the end of the week, I'd been out of the house for two complete days and three evening outings. I am exhausted!
We had a great time Thursday night. Lynn and I went to Amy and Ben's to watch the Democratic Convention. Renee and her boyfriend came later. We had pizza and enjoyed the time together and the convention speeches. I'd been watching at home all week, but it was nice to watch with family and to chat during the in between times about what was going on - I enjoyed the coverage on television, but I liked having both my kids and Amy and Ben all together for some quality family time. That was the best part of the whole week!
Saturday, August 30, 2008
Saturday, August 23, 2008
Empty Nest Syndrome
I've heard of this and read about it, especially folks doing crazy things when their kids leave home, like have another one or adopt a few or lose their minds!!
I am very much looking forward to an empty nest. I actually had a nice sample last fall with Renee living on campus and Lynn in Memphis, the last couple of days, he's been at his foster mom's and Renee has been house sitting. So, it's just been me and the cat!
Been pretty quiet - I guess I've listened to a 1000 songs, watched a little t.v. and slept quite a bit. Not sleeping because of anything but sheer exhaustion, I've taken a few days off from work and then realized just how dog tired I really am.
Anyway, back to my subject, I'm looking forward to the kids being on their own. And, I want a smaller space, just enough for me, the cat is going with Renee, that I can have my books, a t.v. and the computer, that's all. I don't want to keep a bigger place than I can comfortably take care of and use all of. Right now, I never go past the computer in the living room, so there are three rooms in this house I rarely even enter.
That makes me wonder too about some of my friends and neighbors who've kept the big house even though all of the kids are long gone. I think that must be a burden though, I can barely motorvate enough to keep me afloat, I sure don't want to have to dust and vacuum rooms no one ever uses!
I think part of it too is that to truly downsize, you have to get rid of a lot of stuff. But it's just stuff!! But, it becomes important to physically maintain the memories and the appearance of being important to the memory.
My point is, I don't have to have the piano to remember taking Amy to her lessons, or Renee playing on it when she was a year old, or Meaghan's reindition of "Jesus Loves Me, Yes He Does". I don't have to have every piece of paper my children ever brought home from school to remember their school days (and yes, at one point, I had EVERY SINGLE PIECE OF PAPER!!)
Well, I'm hopeful to become an empty nester in the next 12-24 months - maybe - downsize to a one bedroom apartment and sit in the sun as often as weather permits.
I am very much looking forward to an empty nest. I actually had a nice sample last fall with Renee living on campus and Lynn in Memphis, the last couple of days, he's been at his foster mom's and Renee has been house sitting. So, it's just been me and the cat!
Been pretty quiet - I guess I've listened to a 1000 songs, watched a little t.v. and slept quite a bit. Not sleeping because of anything but sheer exhaustion, I've taken a few days off from work and then realized just how dog tired I really am.
Anyway, back to my subject, I'm looking forward to the kids being on their own. And, I want a smaller space, just enough for me, the cat is going with Renee, that I can have my books, a t.v. and the computer, that's all. I don't want to keep a bigger place than I can comfortably take care of and use all of. Right now, I never go past the computer in the living room, so there are three rooms in this house I rarely even enter.
That makes me wonder too about some of my friends and neighbors who've kept the big house even though all of the kids are long gone. I think that must be a burden though, I can barely motorvate enough to keep me afloat, I sure don't want to have to dust and vacuum rooms no one ever uses!
I think part of it too is that to truly downsize, you have to get rid of a lot of stuff. But it's just stuff!! But, it becomes important to physically maintain the memories and the appearance of being important to the memory.
My point is, I don't have to have the piano to remember taking Amy to her lessons, or Renee playing on it when she was a year old, or Meaghan's reindition of "Jesus Loves Me, Yes He Does". I don't have to have every piece of paper my children ever brought home from school to remember their school days (and yes, at one point, I had EVERY SINGLE PIECE OF PAPER!!)
Well, I'm hopeful to become an empty nester in the next 12-24 months - maybe - downsize to a one bedroom apartment and sit in the sun as often as weather permits.
Friday, August 22, 2008
Motivation
You know motivation is a very personal thing. It's between you and yourself only.
This came to me this morning from out of nowhere, and made me realize that although I am 48 years old, I still don't know everything and never will. But, I am motivated to keep going to try to learn as much as I can, do as much as I can, and never quit.
But, while I feel that way today, I tried to remember if there was ever a time I wasn't motivated. I'm sure there were times as a young adult, my lack of motivation for the positive things in life must have driven my mom crazy.
I was thinking about my son Lynn, he's not feeling well and his heart is broken from a recent break up. Lynn is a good person with a good heart, I know he is, but he's not motivated to use his energy in a positive way. One of his teachers said to me when he was a freshman in high school that he (the teacher) had not found what would motivate Lynn to use his talents and energy in a positive manner. At this point, I have not either.
And thinking about that very thing made me realize that he has all the tools he needs to do good, do right, and have a good life. He's been raised with a good foundation, although he's fighting it tooth and nail right now. He had two parents that both had amazingly strong work ethics. And there are hundreds of prayers said for this child on a daily basis.
When Lynn realizes all he needs is for himself to get up and get going, that it's all on and in him, he'll be fine!
This came to me this morning from out of nowhere, and made me realize that although I am 48 years old, I still don't know everything and never will. But, I am motivated to keep going to try to learn as much as I can, do as much as I can, and never quit.
But, while I feel that way today, I tried to remember if there was ever a time I wasn't motivated. I'm sure there were times as a young adult, my lack of motivation for the positive things in life must have driven my mom crazy.
I was thinking about my son Lynn, he's not feeling well and his heart is broken from a recent break up. Lynn is a good person with a good heart, I know he is, but he's not motivated to use his energy in a positive way. One of his teachers said to me when he was a freshman in high school that he (the teacher) had not found what would motivate Lynn to use his talents and energy in a positive manner. At this point, I have not either.
And thinking about that very thing made me realize that he has all the tools he needs to do good, do right, and have a good life. He's been raised with a good foundation, although he's fighting it tooth and nail right now. He had two parents that both had amazingly strong work ethics. And there are hundreds of prayers said for this child on a daily basis.
When Lynn realizes all he needs is for himself to get up and get going, that it's all on and in him, he'll be fine!
Monday, August 18, 2008
Crushes
Do you remember the first really bad crush you had? Lord, I do. It was so bad that it still can make me a little dizzy today.
I remember seeing him for the very first time. I was in the 10th grade and it was my first day at Glencliff High School. We were going to be at Wright Jr. High down the street because the high school was under construction. We all had to go to the gym to be sorted, like cattle!
As I reached the end of the hall that fed into the gym, I turned slightly left to go into the gym and saw this boy at the end of the hall near the door going outside. He was hanging with his 'homies'. They were laughing and cutting up and were about the last ones to enter the gym. I never took my eyes off of him! I was gone from that moment on!
He was a senior and I was only a sophomore and I doubt seriously that he ever knew who I was. I admired him from afar the entire school year, my best friend knew and teased me about him, but I didn't allow her to mention one thing about who he was. I can't describe him or call his name, some of you regular readers know him!
It was so bad that I blushed everytime I saw him, got flustered and couldn't speak, thought about him constantly, and dreamed about him often.
The funniest part of this now is that he is coming to the class reunion. Oh, I've been over it for years and years, I'm pretty sure he's married, probably fat and bald, hell, I'm fat and gray headed, but it's been a good laugh to remember that crush and how bad it was. I can only imagine if I'd ever felt that way about the man I ended up marrying!
I remember seeing him for the very first time. I was in the 10th grade and it was my first day at Glencliff High School. We were going to be at Wright Jr. High down the street because the high school was under construction. We all had to go to the gym to be sorted, like cattle!
As I reached the end of the hall that fed into the gym, I turned slightly left to go into the gym and saw this boy at the end of the hall near the door going outside. He was hanging with his 'homies'. They were laughing and cutting up and were about the last ones to enter the gym. I never took my eyes off of him! I was gone from that moment on!
He was a senior and I was only a sophomore and I doubt seriously that he ever knew who I was. I admired him from afar the entire school year, my best friend knew and teased me about him, but I didn't allow her to mention one thing about who he was. I can't describe him or call his name, some of you regular readers know him!
It was so bad that I blushed everytime I saw him, got flustered and couldn't speak, thought about him constantly, and dreamed about him often.
The funniest part of this now is that he is coming to the class reunion. Oh, I've been over it for years and years, I'm pretty sure he's married, probably fat and bald, hell, I'm fat and gray headed, but it's been a good laugh to remember that crush and how bad it was. I can only imagine if I'd ever felt that way about the man I ended up marrying!
Saturday, August 16, 2008
Myspace Update
So today I've updated my myspace to include a picture of Obama and my about me section to be a rant about Obama and Republicans. I told Renee it was 4:16 on Saturday afternoon, and gave her two names that will bust me big time within 24 hours. Stay tuned for the update.
Thursday, August 14, 2008
Reunion Blues
So today I've got the reunion blues! I'm still looking forward to it, but with a little less gusto than I've had. I'm sure that will improve again, we've just had a little problem with the venue and as of right now, we are homeless!
I have all the confidence in the folks working on that piece - and I'm sure we'll have a spot somewhere in this city! I think I'm just gonna take a reunion break for a week or so and let my mind rejuvenate itself!
That being said, school started this week in Nashville. My alma mater, and Renee's, is in dire need of parents to help the band. Same song, different year! This year I just can't commit to much, but I'll do what I can.
Renee and I sat down today with her class and work schedule so I could figure out the exact hours I'll be working for awhile, at least until we get her a car. Hopefully that will be soon.
It's be a lot sooner if that idiot in East Nashville would just pay. Folks tell me it'll get better between us oneday, especially if we are ever grandparents, but I don't see it. I started a new blog - one where I intended to vent all of my frustration, tell everything, sorta like the ultimate therapy trip - BUT - I cannot remember the name of it, my logon (since it was different) or anything. Total blank I draw - go figure that one!
Well, enough blogging for today - think I'll hit the deck for a little vitamin D thru the skin!
I have all the confidence in the folks working on that piece - and I'm sure we'll have a spot somewhere in this city! I think I'm just gonna take a reunion break for a week or so and let my mind rejuvenate itself!
That being said, school started this week in Nashville. My alma mater, and Renee's, is in dire need of parents to help the band. Same song, different year! This year I just can't commit to much, but I'll do what I can.
Renee and I sat down today with her class and work schedule so I could figure out the exact hours I'll be working for awhile, at least until we get her a car. Hopefully that will be soon.
It's be a lot sooner if that idiot in East Nashville would just pay. Folks tell me it'll get better between us oneday, especially if we are ever grandparents, but I don't see it. I started a new blog - one where I intended to vent all of my frustration, tell everything, sorta like the ultimate therapy trip - BUT - I cannot remember the name of it, my logon (since it was different) or anything. Total blank I draw - go figure that one!
Well, enough blogging for today - think I'll hit the deck for a little vitamin D thru the skin!
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
I Hate Bitchy Men!
Can I say it loud enough? There's nothing worse that a bitch man!
My husband was a bitch! Oh yeah, don't let him hear anything that remotely resembled gossip, or that you knew something about someone, not only did he tell it, usually to the person it was about, he'd tell you told it, etc. I learned not to say anything in front of him - not even about the time of day!
Now, I'm facing this with my son! Oh yes, the bitch of all times. I'm somewhat involved in neighborhood things and there've been incidences with 2 houses lately in which some of his so-called friends live. I'm not sure these people are friends - they like Lynn when he has cash or they all need a ride - but otherwise, I'm afraid he'd just be stranded if he was the needy party.
But, since he's heard me discussing some of these situations, he's been on the phone to his little punk friends telling them what I've said and calling me a 'snitch'. Now, some of the activity has been illegal. Don't know who they think they're fooling - the whole world knows - but I've gotten to wondering if I'm about to be on a hit list because my bitch son can't keep his mouth shut.
What this means is that I never discuss anything neighborhood again if he's in hearing distance, act like I don't know anything about what's going on, and duck if I hear little pops (a damn daily experience in this 'hood)
Oh, he knows exactly how I feel about what he's done too - rest assured, I am better at being nice and act like I've had some raising on this blog, much more than I am in person, at least dealing with Lynn!
Anyway, if I could raise my leg more than 4 inches, I'd go to East Nashville and kick someone in the shins!
My husband was a bitch! Oh yeah, don't let him hear anything that remotely resembled gossip, or that you knew something about someone, not only did he tell it, usually to the person it was about, he'd tell you told it, etc. I learned not to say anything in front of him - not even about the time of day!
Now, I'm facing this with my son! Oh yes, the bitch of all times. I'm somewhat involved in neighborhood things and there've been incidences with 2 houses lately in which some of his so-called friends live. I'm not sure these people are friends - they like Lynn when he has cash or they all need a ride - but otherwise, I'm afraid he'd just be stranded if he was the needy party.
But, since he's heard me discussing some of these situations, he's been on the phone to his little punk friends telling them what I've said and calling me a 'snitch'. Now, some of the activity has been illegal. Don't know who they think they're fooling - the whole world knows - but I've gotten to wondering if I'm about to be on a hit list because my bitch son can't keep his mouth shut.
What this means is that I never discuss anything neighborhood again if he's in hearing distance, act like I don't know anything about what's going on, and duck if I hear little pops (a damn daily experience in this 'hood)
Oh, he knows exactly how I feel about what he's done too - rest assured, I am better at being nice and act like I've had some raising on this blog, much more than I am in person, at least dealing with Lynn!
Anyway, if I could raise my leg more than 4 inches, I'd go to East Nashville and kick someone in the shins!
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