So You Think You Know It All

As parents, don't we think we know it all? We sure do, I mean we brought these kids into the world so we take exclusive ownership of every moment of their lives. Now, with an infant that works just fine and it absolutely necessary. Actually, it's not us 100% - what about the baby that cries no matter what you do? I had one of those - he and I were both wore out, but that's a whole other story, probably a book.

The point I'm trying to make is, when they are in-utero and beginning at birth, we control every move. Where they are at, what they eat, what they wear, what they have to wear, when and where they bathe (we bathe them), we buy it all and take care of it all. Somewhere around age 5-6 my kids started to take their own baths - supervised of course and then moved on into shower range about 7. I have to pat myself on the back here - one of my acquaintances still bathes her daughter is almost 9. Do I have to say I think that is bizarre if not, almost, perverted? (Bet my phone rings on this one!)

We begin letting them choose what they wear, and who they'll play with at school. We let them choose their lunches at school while we maintain control over breakfast and supper - unless we give them the choice of the hamburger or chicken nuggets if we go to McDonalds.

I have a point, please bear with me and continue reading.

As they grow, our job as parents is to let them begin to make decisions, guiding them, talking and teaching. Our goal is to get them to be self-sufficient, find something they have a passion for to spend their live's work doing, and hoping they find happiness in a relationship and have as few hard times as possible.

Then, we, the know it all parents, become the hardest time they'll probably ever have! Does this make sense? No, but we call it parenting and justify to ourselves that we are still 100% in control of this person's life. We decide we don't like the person they are dating, or the way they wear their hair, or how fast they drive, or the radio station they listen to, just name it because there is a parent somewhere right now fussing about the color of their child's nail polish.

And, it's during these times that some of us (not me, remember, I"m the expert here!) say things to our child that are utterly ridiculous. Why on earth would you tell your child they are a disappointment to you? You can say "I'm disappointed in the choice you are making", that's different and doesn't hurt feelings because it's not a personal attack.

I want to be the last person on earth who makes my child cry - they will meet plenty of people who will make them cry, some will be loved ones, some will be someone they think they love, and some will be ornery persons just looking to hurt someone, but Mom, well she's supposed to be above the rest.

Stay tuned, there's more to this tangent!