I'm sure any of you who've had to deal with child support could not have had a bigger idiot or asshole to deal with as I have - at least, I hope for your sakes you didn't.
The entire time I was married to him, he swore that he'd kill me dead before he'd pay me a dime. I've never decided for sure if that was one reason I stayed 10 years too long - could have been - but that's probably a book in itself.
Anyway, for the first year or so we were separated, I didn't do anything legal. Then, after my mom died I proceeded with divorce proceedings. Some of that was to keep him from calling her, etc., part was probably to spare her any added misery, and part was to spare me from both of them.
So, we go to court in November 2003 at which time I am awarded over $800.00 per month child support. He was driving a truck, making good money, and declined visitation with the kids (which gave me an extra $20.00 per week). He promptly left the courtroom, drove to his employer and quit his job!
To cut to the chase, I've collected about $6K the last two years from him - because the child support office has garnisheed everything they can. And, the monthly amount was reduced a couple of times because our daughter aged out and because he claims not to have any income at all now.
So, I am three months from my youngest child being 18 years old at which point the child support will stop accumulating. And, currently, he owes me over $29,000.00!!!!
And, it appears that he may actually be able to pay me off - not that he wants to or that he's not trying every way possible not to - in the fairly near future. He wants to settle for a lesser amount and call everything else even. In my mind, I might could agree to something, but my dollar amount and his will never mesh. One of my friends asked me why I'd even consider settling for a lesser amount - I have no answer for that. Except, that my mom said it best, I was stupid when I was with him. And, he's not cute, charming, or nice. Even Dr. Phil couldn't help that one!
AND, the kicker is - he wants to be able to dictate how the money is spent!! After 6 years of being alone all the time with the kids, him never taking them even for a day, 6 years of me being the one to do without so that they could have everything they needed and all they wanted I could afford to give them, 6 years of me working long hours, and multiple jobs, even after I went on 100% disability, 6 years of his judgmental degradation about any mistake Lynn makes but no accolades for either of them's accomplishments and successes. His comment to Renee was to make sure "your momma splits this money between you and Lynn"!
Is this man for real? Can you imagine how stupid I think he is - I won't be angry because I won't give him that control, but, the fact that after all these years he thinks I'm still stupid about him, in fact, he's banking on it, does chap my ass a bit! Then Amy says for me to be careful, if they make him pay me, he'll be over here trying to come back!! OMG - if anybody sees anything to make you suspect at all I've lost my mind, because that's what it would have to be, please please call the men in white coats and have me locked up!
Don't anybody get excited, or look for the postcard from the islands, I'll believe it when I see it!
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