Saturday, November 5, 2016

Just My Thoughts - First Published Sept 16 2009

Just My Thoughts


Lately, I hear so many folks saying so many negative things about other people. From the fights on Facebook over politics, to the crazy things that happen on television award shows, to the insane things talked about dead folks, and the one that prompted me to write this – the ignorant remarks of a few college students with whom my daughter has classes.

Each time I’ve heard these comments, read the posts, or generally been exposed to these things, my mind keeps going back to something I heard a little over a year ago. That remark I would like to share and excuse me, but preach for a minute or two.

On July 7, 2008 the plane carrying then presidential candidate Barack Obama had to make an emergency landing. Keep reading – when I was listening to the news reports that afternoon they were playing the tower to plane conversation. The pilot had already radioed that were in trouble and the tower knew it – the tower’s question to the pilot was “How many souls on board?”. The pilot went on to answer “56 souls on board”.

I must say I had an epiphany of sorts at that moment – it hit me like a Mack truck that regardless of WHO we are, we each and everyone have a soul. That soul is transparent to God, meaning it does not matter if you are Obama or the person on the plane that was there to keep water glasses filled, you are a SOUL!

Doesn’t matter how much we may disagree on political matters – makes for lively debate and hopefully, expansion of your mind. Doesn’t matter how ‘liberal’ you may think I am, or how ‘conservative’ you consider yourself. Doesn’t matter if you worshiped in a church with 1000 members on Sunday or if your prayers to God were moaned in desperation. Doesn’t matter if you’re fortunate to work for a corporation that can offer private health care at minimal expense to you or if you are a mother trying to raise your children and need an option to keep them healthy. Doesn’t matter if your dad wrote a check to pay your tuition in full or you are on a full ride scholarship because you worked your butt off in high school to be able to get the education you want.

All of these, and so many many more, are just examples of how we are different and how wonderful this world can be because of our differences. If each and every one of us could only remember that each and every other person was just a SOUL, imagine how wonderful this world would be! 

Birthday Thoughts - First Published May 31 2010

Birthday THoughts


So, I guess it's no secret as I've posted things this birthday week, that music has played a big part in my family's life.

I was so very blessed to have parents that loved and appreciated music - all types. We grew up listening to Danny Davis, Billy Vaughn, Lawrence Welk, Dean Martin, The Lovin' Spoonful, Duane Eddy, you name it - my mom probably had the album. What a blessing and legacy they left to us - for the enjoyment and comfort of music through the years has been a tremendous presence.

And, bless their hearts for living through the Beatles, Sweet, Kansas, Lynyrd Skynyrd and Ted Nugent!
I suppose there was more than a time or two they thought maybe having a really nice stereo system in the house might NOT have been a good idea.

Tomorrow I will be big 50! Everything I am today was shaped first by my parents, my siblings, and then my children. I am nothing without them in my life.

I don't know how much longer I have on this earth, but I am so very grateful for the years I've had, the family, the friends, the experiences, good and bad, for all of them are a little part of this package called "Ms. Lisa"!

Love and peace to you all!

A Mother's Love - First Published Feb 25 2013

A Mother's Love

So yesterday was Mom's birthday.  I made a comment about it on Facebook and really enjoyed the comments that came back.  Spent the old day thinking about her and the family as a whole.

You know, our mothers are the first person we know and the only one that will ever know us inside and out.  Moms hear and feel your heartbeat from the inside, feel the first movement as you begin to wiggle fingers and toes and the movements where her dress jumps, your heel is pushed almost through her abdomen, or the times when it feels like you're stomping your way out of the womb.  No one else will ever know how you felt growing and developing in her body.

Your mom is usually the first person (after the doc maybe) your little eyes don't focus on - but believe me - mom knows you in that first look.  And until you feel that wave of emotion that passes through your body when you see that baby for the first time, you cannot ever know exactly how your Mother felt nor appreciate just how much she loved you.

As I begin to raise my kids, there were moments I realized how my mom must have felt (usually if I felt disappointed, because I know I disappointed her several times.  There were moments I opened my mouth and my Mom came out - shocking, but then I had to admit how very right she had been!!  Times when I stopped for a minute just to say a prayer of thanks for the Mom I'd had, the way she'd raised me, and how blessed I had been.  And at this stage in life, a deep understanding and appreciation for all of her love and sacrifice because there is no end to what a mother will do for her kids.  

Mom and I had a conversation just a couple of weeks before she died in which she was giving me instructions on how to handle arrangements, etc.  She went on to say that raising us hadn't always been easy, but they (she and Dad) had gotten lucky, they'd good kids.  I told her we were the lucky ones!!  Tears came to her eyes as she said "thank you for saying that".

I never spoke truer words.

I guess I must have a point here - and it's this - tell your parents how you really feel about them and don't wait until it's too late.  You'll be glad you did and you'll be able to enjoy the memories without a lot of sorrow.


2013 - The Year of the Concert - First Published Nov 13 2013

2013 - The Year of the Concert

As most of you know, I dubbed 2013 the year of the concert several months ago when I made a decision to try and see every show I wanted to and could.  As we near the end of the year, I am satisfied and happy with the choices and shows, and done for the year.  The cold weather has finally arrived in Nashville, and that is my cue to hibernate as much as possible for the next three or four months.

Early spring started and the first show was Kid Rock!  What an awesome show!  I was accompanied by my daughter, Lisa Renee Martin, and we had a great time!  I think she enjoyed watching me jump around and chair dance the most!!  She said it was disturbing that I knew all the words to "Crazy Bitch" by Buckcherry - but hey, what can I say?  I will say this, it took me three or four days to recover from Kid Rock!  Note to self, you are not as young as you once were!!  

Second concert of the year was to see The Four Tops and The Temptations!  This was my first show at the Ryman - very glad to see the Temptations with Otis Williams.  Last year, Renee, Marg, Sheila and I had seen the Temptation Review with Dennis Edwards - so life is complete!  I've seen as many of the Temps as I can.  I sang some but I DID NOT wear myself out!

In May I went to see Elton John at the Bridgestone!  It was my third, and probably last, time to see him.  Renee and her husband Chris Estes went with me.  It was a great show - although we were in the top top section and I couldn't really look around to see how high we were.  Thank goodness for jumbo trans!

The next concert I bought tickets for was this little band I dearly love - Alabama Shakes.  I ended up not going, a decision I do not regret, and was very glad my friend and work buddy Kathy Biss Bates enjoyed the tickets.  I will hold out to see them until they are playing an inside venue!

In October, I was greatly pleased to be accompanied by my brother, Mike Furkins, to see the Eagles!  What an incredible show!  We had a great time, it had been 20+ years since we'd been to a concert together.  I can imagine a better time being had by two folks - and I'm so glad to share this memory with him!

I did make it to one Nashville Symphony show - my old pal Sherry Sloan accompanied me.  We enjoyed catching up before the show and then the show was awesome!  I'd never seen a piano with a keyboard at both ends - pretty amazing piece of equipment!  I have season tickets to the symphony, so I'll be attending some shows in 2014.

The grand finale was a trip Monday night back to the Ryman to see Lynyrd Skynyrd.  It was Lynn's birthday and he was my guest.  We had a great time and the show was wonderful!  It was sobering to see how the guys have aged (well, I have too) but amazing to see how they could still jam!  Lynn said he thought their fingers would fall off!!

I am a very blessed woman - and this year has been lots of fun!  


50 Years Ago Today - What I Remember - First Published Nov 22 2013

50 Years Ago Today - What I Remember

Fifty years ago today, I remember quite alot, even if I was only 3 1/2 years old. 

My family lived in the tiny little town of Burkesville, Kentucky.  Dad worked at Burkesville Transfer and Mom was working at the sewing factory - and I don't remember it's name. 

We had a young girl, she was probably 18 or 19 at the time, who kept me, Mike, who was about to turn 2 on Christmas Day, and Larry who was only 7 months old.  Her name was Evinois - and my memories of her all are quite fond.  She was a loving soul who cared for us three little white kids like we were her own.  Our whole family loved her and she remained in our lives years after we moved away.  That's a whole other note!

Evinois watched "As the World Turns" faithfully everyday.  And while I didn't have a clue what was going on - I'd watch too.   During the program, there was an interruption that said President Kennedy had been shot.  Now, I didn't know who he was, but I was quite concerned that Evinois was upset.  When the second interruption came on to say he had died, she burst into tears, big tears!  I was scared and bewildered but I remember her comforting me to calm my fears.

The house we lived in had three porches - one fully across the back and front and one side.  We had gone outside to the front porch, all the neighbors on the street had done the same.  It was only a short while until my Mom came walking up the street - when the President died, her company closed and sent everyone home.  She had walked the mile or so, I imagine as quickly as possible, to get home to us.  

As she came across the yard from the street, I ran to meet her.  Evinois was holding Larry and Mike was toddling around on the porch.  Mom and Evinois looked at each other, my Mom said "What in the world?" and they hugged.  I remember us all going back inside and so began the first marathon of t.v. watching during a tragedy.

As a kid, I had no real idea of what had happened.  I knew my parents and everyone around me was upset and there was a sense of shaky ground to everything.  As days wore on, I'm sure my little world went back to normal. 

But our whole world never quite returned to normal.  This week I've watched hours about the anniversary, etc.  I have enjoyed Bob Schieffer's recount of the story as a young print reporter of that day and all the other stories that have been shared.  It was truly a time of loss of innocence for this country.  


Food Stamps - First Published Jan 15 2014

Food Stamps

I thought a while before I share the posting on food stamps.  This is one of those things I actually have a little experience with, and have a lot of thoughts about.

In 2005 I found myself without a job or income and facing disability.  My doctor had been telling me for a couple of years I should quit work, but I didn't want to.  Alas, things changed drastically all in one day.

I went to DHS - which is another rant for another day - and applied for food stamps and TennCare since I'd also lost my health insurance.  I had full custody of my two children, and at that point, was not receivng ANY child support from their dad.

I got TennCare and food stamps in the amount of $293.00 per month for three folks.  Right then, the kids were still in school so they automatically got free breakfast and free lunch.  But stretching $293.00 for 30-32 days for three folks is not easy.  Food stamps are supposedly calculated at $1.00 per meal per person when there are no other resources. 

It was all I had to spend on food so it meant that there were no quickie things - no microwave stuff and no junk food.  I know how to cook, how to cook for leftovers, and how to remake those into something new.   I can do wonders with a bag of dried beans and a sack of potatoes - and was glad many times I'd grown up the way I had.  We didn't eat out, but we never missed a meal!

I was blessed in that my social security disability was approved in less than 90 days - imagine that - even they thought I was have been going to die soon.  I only got the food stamps for the 6 months until my SS check came - and that's the way the program was meant to be utilized - as a tool to get from point A to point B without being hungry.

My points are:  If you get food stamps and that is truly how and what you feed your family - there is not money for tattoos, beer, partying of any kind.  If I see you in the store paying for food with an EBT card and you are tatted up one side and down the other, I don't know if you got those first, before some tragedy struck, or if you're lying to the system.  


ANY kind of assistance is meant to be TEMPORARY - it's not for you to live your whole life on because you lie or choose not to do better.  That's laziness and trifling and is not to be tolerated.

Showing Respect and Reverence for Sacrifices Made - First Published Jan 24 2014

Showing Respect and Reverence for Sacrifices Made

Today I watched the video about a funeral in Arlington during the recent snowstorm.  

Close to 30 years ago now I was very fortunate to be to McLean, VA on temporary duty for my employer at the time.  McLean is a suburb of Washington DC.  I would be there 8 weeks.

During that time, several of the other members of the team and I visited DC as often as possible to see as much as possible during our time there.  We were working very hard all day, and playing even harder when we got home.

One evening our trip was to Arlington National Cemetery.  We got there in the afternoon and stayed until ordered to leave when the park was closing.  We got to see a changing of the guard at the Tomb of the Unknown, and all of the other mainstays - the Challenger Memorial, JFK's grave and flame, and a few others I can't recall exactly.

What I do remember is this - the overwhelming feel of respect, reverence and pride.  Respect for what all of those buried there had done and for the humans they were, reverence for the sacrifices they had made and for what our country stood and stands for, and pride in being an American.  I could truly feel that we have a magnificent rich heritage and each of us has reason to be proud of that.  

Everyday, I see place and things that need to be fixed, people too.  And I don't have all the answers.  I don't think any one of us actually does.  But I do know this, I am proud to have been BORN in America, (a little prouder that I was born in the South), and I am glad I CAN work and pay taxes and I will NEVER fail to exercise my right to vote.

And, if I ever forget any of those things, I hope something comes along and reminds me how I felt in Arlington!


AND - by all means, visit Washington DC sometime in your lifetime!  It is well worth the effort!

Beatlemania and Me - First Published Feb 9 2014

Beatlemania and Me

It was 50 years ago today - sound familiar!  Well, I remember it well.  I was not quite four yet, we were living in Burkesville, KY and had gone to Glasgow to visit Pampie (my great-grandmother) and Grandma (Mom's mom).  

When we got over to Grandma's house, the Ed Sullivan Show had come on and I was watching when he introduced "The Beatles".   I surely didn't know alot at that time in life, but I knew one thing,  I liked The Beatles.  A lot!!

So began the last 50 years of countless hours of listening, singing along, playing along on piano or flute, and reading everything I could get my hands on about them.  And the Internet sure did make all of that even easier!

I was at my Pampie's house, sitting on her front porch glider while she read the newspaper to me, the day Ringo Starr became a father for the first time.  Twenty five years later I was home on maternity leave with Renee when I read in the paper that Ringo had become a grandfather!  

Early on the morning of December 8, I woke up to a Beatles song playing.  I hit the snooze and when my nine minutes were up, another Beatles song was playing.  As I lay there listening, when the next song started with no interruption I sat straight up in bed and said "OMG - one of them is dead".

I still have the Time magazine that featured George Harrison the week after his death.  

When I was twelve, for Christmas I got a stereo and two sets of Beatle compilation albums - the red and blue covered ones.  I must have listened to them until the grooves were gone!  My Mom told me years later that she and my Dad had thought they would die if they had to hear the Beatles one more time!

The summer I turned 50 years old, Paul McCartney came to Nashville for the first time in 38 years.  Not only did I get to share that night with Paul, but with my daughter Renee.  It was literally one of the best nights of my life.

Tonight I'll be watching as the Grammy Salutes The Beatles is on television.  I'll sing along, laugh and I'm sure tear up at some scenes.  I'll be both happy for the times had and sad for the ones missed.

Thank you to The Beatles for a lifetime of songs and smiles!


An Eventful Week - First Published Mar 14 2014

An Eventful Week

What a week it has been!  Monday came and so did my first grandchild - Cameron Rondale Martin!   Honestly, I had no idea that my heart could ever swell more with love and pride, but it did.  It was a marvelous feeling, like falling in love, and I'm so very grateful.

Wednesday marked a milestone in my life that is bittersweet.  Amy mentioned it in her post that it would have been our Daddy's 77th birthday!  It's so hard to believe that he has been gone 19 years - and oh how I missed him more this week than I've ever known I could miss him.  

There have been so many days I wished I could just talk to him for a minute, could just hug him again, or see his sheepish grin when he'd got us and knew it.  But, when I went to meet Cameron on Wednesday and looked down into that little precious face, I thought about my Daddy.

Daddy was my first visitor in recovery after Renee was born.  He was a quiet man, but the conversation we had in those few minutes is etched forever in my brain and only this week, looking down into the face of my little grandson, did I really have a clue what my Daddy was feeling that day.  Long years of hard work, hopes and prayers  and his child had become a parent.   He got to see that two more times before he had to leave us - I am so grateful for that!

I know my Dad would be so very proud of Renee, Lynn, Meaghan and Austin!  Renee has graduated from college and gotten married, Meaghan has one year left of college, Lynn has become a father and Austin starts high school in August.  I can imagine he'd be beaming with a huge smile and pride and I hope all four of these kids know what a special treasure that man truly was, to his family and friends and to the world.  


I love you Daddy, now more than ever!

Remembering Those Lost This Year - First published Dec 7 2014

Remembering Those Lost This Year

I've meant to write this for awhile now, but it seems rather appropriate with the season we are in.  

In the last 14 months I lost three aunts.  I'd like to remember each of them today.

Last October my Mom's only sister (and sibling) passed away.  When I was a child and trying to become a young woman, I was the only niece on that side of the family as Amy was born when I was almost thirteen.  Martha Jean tended to spoil me some, in fact quite a bit.  Everytime we ever stopped to visit, she'd have something for me.  A purse she'd had made by a woman she worked with, hair barettes, and when I reached 11 or 12, she'd always have panty hose for me!  That had to be the coolest gift - Mom was not quite ready for me to cross that bridge, but Martha kept me in hose.  
There were times she and Mom would be on the outs - as only siblings can understand and will happen from time to time.  After Mom died, there wasn't but a handful of Saturday nights that Martha and I did not chat by phone.  The last three or four years neither of us could travel so we had not seen each other, but we always talked.  Thru those conversations we shared our lives and memories and filled in blanks for each other.  She encouraged me when Lynn was acting up and I reciprocated when Robbie was doing the same.  We cried together over good memories and bad things - like Robbie's motorcycle accident.  And we laughed - A LOT of laughing!  

We'd discussed the end as she knew it was near - and the last words I heard her say was "I love you Lisa Gayle".  She died the next day and I miss her everyday in this world.  It's a different miss than my Momma but I'd love to talk to her again.  Narry a Saturday night goes by that I don't think, after I'm settled in bed, that it's phone call time.

Last May, my cousin Mylinda called me to say that Bertha had been killed in a car wreck.  Bertha was my Uncle Kyle's wife, Kyle was one of my Dad's brothers.  I didn't know her as well as I now wished I had, but me and Kyle, well sometimes we didn't get along too well.  What I remember most about Bertha was her describing the first time she saw Kyle walking down the street.  She loved that man with all she had and that's all that matters to me.  And Kyle could put a person through some hell, forgive me and may his soul rest in peace, but the truth is the truth!  Her love and devotion puts her on  a high shelf with me and I only wish I'd stayed in touch with her more.  Facebook is pretty amazing in one aspect - we had reconnected and shared a few things, including pictures.  One of her sisters has moved into The Towers and we've become friends and have shared and I feel very blessed to have this opportunity to get to know Bertha better.

In June, my aunt Betty died, after a similar battle to Martha's complicated by cancer.  Betty was married to Harry, my Dad's youngest brother.  They were only about 8 years old than me - more like older siblings.  I was 14 when they married so Betty was around for all of the hard stuff a young person goes through.  There were a lot of times she offered encouragement without comdemnation and for that I'll eternally be grateful.  Sometimes,  a person needs someone to not pass judgement!

Betty and Harry got a new Cobra II around 1976 or so - it was white with the blue markings - just perfect!  And a four speed?  Maybe, something manual.  Anyway, I was getting to driving age and bless Betty's heart, she tried to teach me.  Now, anyone who knows my past knows I was a horrible driver for years and it wasn't her fault I just couldn't grasp it at all, but she tried, right out on Nolensville Road in that Cobra.   I'm not sure anybody else knew that until today??

By the time I graduated from high school, they'd had Mylinda and Jeremy and were very busy.  But I still saw them pretty often, Betty would invite us for soup and chili - she sure made a mean pot of both and the best cornbread I've ever eaten.  When I had the big wreck, Betty and Harry came to Stallworth to see me.  They brought potato soup and cornbread!  YUMMY!

The only time I remember Betty being anything less than 100% in my corner was when I got engaged.  And even then, she only said "I can't be happy for you".  And when the time came that the marriage ended, etc.  she didn't say "I told you so".  Betty was a kind and generous soul and I'm glad to have known and loved her.

This time of year lots of things come to mind - Christmas's past and Christmas's future (especially since I have grandchildren now) but in this Christmas present I'd like to remember the ones who left this year and what they meant to me!


Challenge to Pray - first posted Sept 5 2015

Challenge to Pray

My post yesterday was inspired by all the rhetoric I hear about Mexicans and Muslims and how they are ruining our country.  I don't agree with that at all - but I was led to share some personal thoughts on prayer.

The Islamic faith dictates prayer at least 5 times per day and each prayer ritual is from 10-15 minutes in length.  So for the sake of my pending argument, let's go with 5 x 10 and count 50 minutes per day in dedicated prayer.

Even though I say a prayer in the morning and something longer in the evening and a few sentence prayers through the day, "Give me strength", etc. I don't come close to spending 50 minutes a day praying.  

So today I am challenging myself and all of you to spend at least 50 minutes a day in prayer.  Earnest prayer - where you really talk to God and let him communicate to you!  Pray sincerely - not just words but what's really on your heart.  Praise Him for who He is, all powerful and omnipotent.  Confess your sins asking for forgiveness and fortification not to repeat them.  Thank Him for everything He's provided, including this world we live in.  Ask for what you need.  

I just think if we'd all spend at least 50 minutes a day praying, we could really see some changes.  If nowhere else but in our own lives, which will in turn, change the world.



Friday, November 4, 2016

Reflections - First posted Dec 31 2-15

Reflections
The time between Thanksgiving and New Years is always a time of reflection for me. It starts when I think about everything I have been and am thankful for in my life, carries thru the Christmas spirit and on to New Years, where I don’t make resolutions so much anymore but set goals and try to improve life for me and those around me.
2015 was a fairly difficult year for me and most of the ones I love. There has been more than our share of sickness, yours truly spent 104 days in VUMC or Richland Place Rehabilitation Center trying to shake a MRSA infection in my bloodstream. I didn’t look as sick as I felt, I hope, but it was nasty and I’m glad it’s behind me. I am very thankful for the medical treatment and PT and OT for getting me back on a tolerable path.
A couple of days ago I thought I had this new year coming in figured out, at least what I was going to be doing for most of it. There are still some primary goals, finish the kid’s scrapbooks, continue to purge and downsize, a couple of new pieces of furniture I want to buy. But, there are a few more changes I plan to make, no definite plans yet, but I had an epiphany yesterday about myself and what I deserve that is a game changer.
I think my point is that although John Mellencamp said “life goes on, even after the thrill of living is gone” it is up to each of us to put the thrill back in our lives. Stay tuned!

A wonderful, safe and healthy New Year to each and everyone of you!

We Pray for Children

We Pray for Children
This was written by Ina J. Hughes and published in 1995. My first exposure to it was in a training at the YMCA and I was asked to read it out loud. Parts of it were easy - other parts - and you’ll know which ones - were heart wrenching and I could barely get thru them. I made it, but not without tears and not without my heart forever being changed to the children of this world and their plights.

We pray for children who sneak popsicles before supper,who erase holes in math workbooks, who can never find their shoes.
And we pray, for those who stare at photographers from behind barbed wire,who can't bound down the street in a new pair of sneakers, who never "counted potatoes," who are born in places where we wouldn't be caught dead ,who never go to the circus ,who live in an X-rated world.
We pray for childrenwho bring us sticky kisses and fistfuls of dandelions, Who sleep with the cat and bury goldfish, Who hug us in a hurry and forget their lunch money, Who squeeze toothpaste all over the sink, Who slurp their soup.
And we pray for thosewho never get dessert, who have no safe blanket to drag behind them, who watch their parents watch them die,who can't find any bread to steal, who don't have any rooms to clean up, whose pictures aren't on anybody's dresser, whose monsters are real.
We pray for children who spend all their allowance before Tuesday, who throw tantrums in the grocery store and pick at their food, who like ghost stories, who shove dirty clothes under the bed,and never rinse out the tub, who get visits from the tooth fairy, who don't like to be kissed in front of the carpool, who squirm in church or temple and scream in the phone, whose tears we sometimes laugh atand whose smiles can make us cry.
And we pray for those whose nightmares come in the daytime, who will eat anything, who have never seen a dentist, who aren't spoiled by anybody, who go to bed hungry and cry themselves to sleep, who live and move, but have no being.
We pray for children who want to be carried and for those who must,for those we never give up on and for those who don't get a second chance. For those we smother…and for those who will grab the hand of anybody kind enough to offer it.
We pray for children. Amen