We are Each a Soul

Lately, I hear so many folks saying so many negative things about other people. From the fights on Facebook over politics, to the crazy things that happen on television award shows, to the insane things talked about dead folks, and the one that prompted me to write this – the ignorant remarks of a few college students with whom my daughter has classes.

Each time I’ve heard these comments, read the posts, or generally been exposed to these things, my mind keeps going back to something I heard a little over a year ago. That remark I would like to share and excuse me, but preach for a minute or two.

On July 7, 2008 the plane carrying then presidential candidate Barack Obama had to make an emergency landing. Keep reading – when I was listening to the news reports that afternoon they were playing the tower to plane conversation. The pilot had already radioed that were in trouble and the tower knew it – the tower’s question to the pilot was “How many souls on board?”. The pilot went on to answer “56 souls on board”.

I must say I had an epiphany of sorts at that moment – it hit me like a Mack truck that regardless of WHO we are, we each and everyone have a soul. That soul is transparent to God, meaning it does not matter if you are Obama or the person on the plane that was there to keep water glasses filled, you are a SOUL!

Doesn’t matter how much we may disagree on political matters – makes for lively debate and hopefully, expansion of your mind. Doesn’t matter how ‘liberal’ you may think I am, or how ‘conservative’ you consider yourself. Doesn’t matter if you worshiped in a church with 1000 members on Sunday or if your prayers to God were moaned in desperation. Doesn’t matter if you’re fortunate to work for a corporation that can offer private health care at minimal expense to you or if you are a mother trying to raise your children and need an option to keep them healthy. Doesn’t matter if your dad wrote a check to pay your tuition in full or you are on a full ride scholarship because you worked your butt off in high school to be able to get the education you want.

All of these, and so many many more, are just examples of how we are different and how wonderful this world can be because of our differences. If each and every one of us could only remember that each and every other person was just a SOUL, imagine how wonderful this world would be!

Getting my Hopes Up

I did this past week, I met someone whom I thought was very nice and he seemed to be very intelligent, well spoken, and thoughtful. But, as so often is the case, he was good at a ruse and true colors came out.

I feel somewhat disappointed, I don't really have any expectations, and I'm glad that I got my hopes up - that is a far cry from the way my life was for so many years I was married and a long time afterwards - I didn't have any expectations for success at anything - so that is progress.

But, I think I thought disappointment would feel different now. Nope, it's the same old thing. So glad it was only a small amount of time that I will not call wasted, just more education!!

Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince

So I finally got to see the movie last night! I loved it and want to see it again soon - the book had so much more in it and I'm glad I had re-read the book a few weeks ago.

Daniel Radcliffe has grown up to be quite the hottie - I think I've got a crush on him and today say "R Pattz who?"!

Alan Rickman is one of my favorite actors - he looked the sexiest I've ever seen Snape look. Now, my history is one that clearly indicates I prefer the bad boys - and Snape is definitely the baddest of the bad - didn't help at all that he looked so hot!!

Harry Potter

Well, it's looking like the 6th installment of the Harry Potter movies is going to do a phenomenal business. We plan to see it next Tuesday - Renee and Chris are going to take me.

I've been reading the book again since I really couldn't remember much of it - or thought I didn't. When the book came out, I devoured it in just a few hours, hence, the poor memory this many years down the road.

The re-read is being quite enjoyful! I do remember it, but I'm not in such a hurry anymore so I'm taking my time to digest and really see what is going on. It's funny - there are a lot of clues to future relationships in this book - I just didn't see them the first time through!

Health and Weight

Today I am trying something new – I am creating my post in Word to put on both blogs. The updates are something I’d post to both and this will make it easier, I think. This is just a quick update to kinda where I am – I have so much to blog about on my health but it’s all going on the pathway page.

I ‘ve seen my doctor again – June 9 to be exact. I had gained 17 pounds and it was obvious that it was all fluid in my legs. Reason for that, off and on meds so much because of the other problem. Somehow, related or not, taking all of my meds (both blood pressures and the diuretic) seemed to make the bleeding so much worse. Now, the doctor didn’t understand why that could be happening, but he wasn’t too worried about the gain since it was all fluid and would come off soon enough. This is a process of getting a problem resolved and I will not be too discouraged.

I am so enjoying the CSA box I get on Wednesdays. Last week we had snow peas, new potatoes, broccoli, lettuce, green onions, white radishes (and boy were they hot) and another quart of strawberries. I have enjoyed every single morsel!! And really looking forward to today’s box – I believe we will have squash and maybe even some green beans!!

My grocery shopping two weeks ago has done well. I did buy a couple of Healthy Choice dinners for the “I’m tired” night that works much better than stopping at McDonalds!

Now, is there a twelve step program for McDonalds? I do believe I am addicted – I will wake up in the morning thinking that a sausage egg mcmuffin would be great for breakfast – especially since they are only $1.00 right now.

Update # 1 June 24

Today I am trying something new – I am creating my post in Word to put on both blogs. The updates are something I’d post to both and this will make it easier, I think. This is just a quick update to kinda where I am – I have so much to blog about on my health but it’s all going on the pathway page.

I ‘ve seen my doctor again – June 9 to be exact. I had gained 17 pounds and it was obvious that it was all fluid in my legs. Reason for that, off and on meds so much because of the other problem. Somehow, related or not, taking all of my meds (both blood pressures and the diuretic) seemed to make the bleeding so much worse. Now, the doctor didn’t understand why that could be happening, but he wasn’t too worried about the gain since it was all fluid and would come off soon enough. This is a process of getting a problem resolved and I will not be too discouraged.

I am so enjoying the CSA box I get on Wednesdays. Last week we had snow peas, new potatoes, broccoli, lettuce, green onions, white radishes (and boy were they hot) and another quart of strawberries. I have enjoyed every single morsel!! And really looking forward to today’s box – I believe we will have squash and maybe even some green beans!!

My grocery shopping two weeks ago has done well. I did buy a couple of Healthy Choice dinners for the “I’m tired” night that works much better than stopping at McDonalds!

Now, is there a twelve step program for McDonalds? I do believe I am addicted – I will wake up in the morning thinking that a sausage egg mcmuffin would be great for breakfast – especially since they are only $1.00 right now.

Moved In

Well, I am finally moved in and settled! It has taken close to a month. Moving date was supposed to be April 25 - but - was delayed a week because I spent 5 days in the hospital.

I will try to make some pictures and upload - it's really cute and I'm very much enjoying it. It's nice and cool and very quiet. I have a 6x9 foot closet that I've turned into a craft room - which is very exciting to me! I actually have time to do some of the projects I've been accumulating for years. I plan to do that too - there are quilts to be quilted - wreaths to be made, purses to be sewn and decorated, and I have a ton of cross stitch stuff as soon as I can get new glasses and some kind of magnifier that works for me!

More later!

My New Apartment

I went today and viewed an apartment I have agree to take. Very exciting! It is a small one bedroom, but it has plenty of room for me and Isaiah. It's about 600 square foot - but - I'll have everything I need and I will be able to take care of it.

I've had about 1500 sq foot for 6 years, and the last year I have really struggled to keep it maintained. I am looking forward to something much more manageable.

Great view out my windows - a lovely grassy area, gazebo, and the campus library which is a beautiful building.

Will be moved by the end of the month! YEAH!!

Another Class Reunion!

Yes, got the invite yesterday. Glencliff's Class of 1979 is having their 30 year reunion in early June and they've invited those from surrounding years. It really is a nice way to have a large turnout of folks and see the most folks you can.

I need to RSVP a big yes - I'm looking forward to going to this one as a guest only. I had a ball last fall, believe me, but this time I can just kick back and relax. Heck, I may even get a DD and throw a few back while I'm at it!

I loved high school - it was a great deal of fun, more than I realized at the time. I wanted both of my kids to love it, Renee did and had a ball. Lynn didn't - well - not the school part and he loved the social scene just a little too much. Good days those were!

Mass Killings are Very Disturbing to Me

Yesterday, a recently unemployed immigrant, who apparently had not mastered English, walked into a community center in Binghamton New York and killed 13 or 14 others before taking his own life.

These kind of things have become way too common, some news I was watching this morning said this was the 3rd such atrocity in America within the last month. That doesn't seem real to me.

I know that times are so very hard. Everyone I know has had to tighten their belts in some ways and there are some folks who are so barely getting by, I can't imagine how they feel. Four years ago, when I first had to start the disability process, I was scared to death and almost in a panic on how we'd survive, especially if I didn't get approved the first time thru. I remember the overwhelmedness and the tears, I cried and cried, until I was just sick. I was blessed beyond words, and while it's not been easy, we've made it pretty good.

I can't imagine if all of that went away suddenly and I had to face losing everything. But, I don't think there's any inkling in my mind that my method of operation would be to load up weapons and take out as many folks as I can. That's the part I don't understand, so maybe, while I think I've known desperate times, I haven't.

Or maybe, it's just that I was raised that when the going gets tough, well, the tough get going! My parents always advocated hard work, no matter what, and no matter how bad something got, there was a way out if you put your mind and back into it. That's so deeply ingrained in me I suppose I can't imagine ever giving up.

If I ever thought I had to give up though, I don't think it would involve hurting anyone else. What's the sense in that? Of course, none of these episodes make sense.

A Change is Coming

So I've been talking about moving for awhile now, and planning on it. But, something happened today that makes it all the more real and so so soon.

My son, no stranger to problems, it seems, has been causing quite a few problems in the neighborhood with his car and friends. As of today, I have a 30 day notice to leave the premises from which I live.

Now, as of today, I no longer have a lease to hold anyone to - so I'm grateful for the 30 days. She could technically have given me 3 and I'd be up a creek in a big way.

I've been packing and sorting since November, but I think I'd better step up the pace. The next few days will be rather hectic.

Moving Day is Coming!

So - everything is set at Trevecca. All I need now is an apartment. Right now there is not a one bedroom open, but he thinks there will be soon. So, I will wait. At this point, as long as I get moved before the worst heat of the summer I'd be good - I hate trying to come in across that deck in August and September. It faces west, so you can only imagine how hot it gets - you will feel like you're going to die just trying to get the door unlocked.

I noticed yesterday that Kmart has their bedding plants, etc. all out and the fenced part of the parking lot with soil, etc. That is the sign I always look for that spring is about to be here! I may go ahead a get a couple of hanging baskets - I have usually let them die about half way thru the summer - so maybe I'll get to enjoy them for awhile.

I have made a list - that's where I always start - with the list. It seems rather daunting right now, but I'm sure it will get better.

Anniversary

Today would have been my 21st wedding anniversary, had I stayed married.

It probably sounds crazy, but I always remember this date and reminisce some about how it used to be. I suppose time does heal all wounds because I don't feel the extreme animosity toward my ex-husband like I once did and I am able to talk about funny or good things that happened. I can even talk about the bad without getting mad or crying.

I actually saw him yesterday. He was in Nashville for physical therapy and came by the house - I had a letter from the child support office he needed a copy of. Both of the kids were here so he got to see them and we sat at the dining room table and talked. He played with Isaiah who promptly spit and hissed like no tomorrow at him!

He has aged, and the years haven't been too kind to him either. Now, we are both just older sicker people who don't need to waste any time on hate or revenge. But, I think we must have reached a point of being able to deal with each other respectfully. It's about time!

Next Stop, Forks Washington

So the DVD's came out this weekend! Amy and Renee were at Borders on West End Friday night to get the special edition they had for sale and to get the GQ magazine in which Rob Pattinson had a spead. Woo hoo!!

Amy hit Target early Saturday morning for more purchases, since their special edition would be different. That's the one I got - has two extra discs of deleted scenes, commentary, etc.

We went to Amy and Ben's to watch the movie Saturday afternoon. It was a lot of fun and I really enjoyed seeing it. At the theatres, the screen had been just a little too big and I had to sit pretty close (wheelchair seating), so, watching it on their television was awesome. I made a tossed salad and got donuts, Amy got pizza and crazy bread! We had a really nice time!

I haven't watched the movie again at home, but I probably will tomorrow. I'm not working and will probably treat myself to at least 1/2 day in bed!

Edward is the bomb!

Only 7 more Days!

Twilight comes out on DVD next Saturday!! I haven't seen the movie since early January - so I am very ready to see it.

Amy plans to be at Target that morning when they open to purchase our copies. And later that day, we're getting together at her house to watch it on the big television. Now, to call Amy and Ben's television a big screen would be just rude - their television is more like a movie screen. Their den is awesome and it's quite exciting to watch things on their t.v. Once we were there watching an Ozzy concert, it was just like being at the real thing. The sound system is great and I just can't wait to be there next weekend!

We're going to get pizza too - maybe we'll watch it more than once! I'm not even sure what time we're supposed to be there, but I'll bet Amy will have already watched it once by the time we get there!

ummm - Robert Pattinson up close and personal!

Rain, Sleet, Snow, Ice, Hail

I think we've seen it all in the last 24 hours. I've decided to stay home again today - it's just too messy and my jaw still hurts and is sore. I don't see any reason to go outside and make it worse - and there's nothing better than sitting up in bed all day on a rainy day!

Except of course, I've gotten up, showered, ate something, and am sitting at the computer with the idea that I will finish the reunion yearbook and get it to the printer tomorrow. I'd also like to make some progress on the history project I've been working on - I have just about 3 weeks to try and finish up most of it - and I really need to get that done. Dreading it is what holds me back, but when I get started it usually rolls right along.

I think dreading something is the worst - and I'm really trying not to do that - just to tackle it headon and get it over with. I think I used to be like that - but I suppose as some things got really hard, or I had a physical reason to put something off - my approach changed. I'm working hard now to get that 'get 'er done' mentality back!

It was 80 Degrees yesterday - and Snow is forecast!

Yep - it was 80 degrees here in Nashville yesterday. Today it is a windy 44 and snow is predicted for the week hours of the morning. I don't expect we'll get any accumulation since the ground will be so warm, but then again, I should be prepared.

I imagine there is a run at Kroger right now - and I should have gone yesterday. The only thing in my fridge today is a few condiments, an 8 oz package of cream cheese and a small bag of baby carrots!

That doesn't bother me - there's crackers and peanut butter, plus all kinds of stuff in the pantry - but it is rather funny to watch my 18 year old son open the fridge and look at all the space. And, he'll do it again knowing I have not left the house like he thinks something will magically appear. No Lynn, the carrots will not grow into turkey and Doritos!

That's one of those things about men that I will never understand and for which I do not think there is any other explanantion except that they are brain damaged. Yes, they are brain damaged and science proves it.

Well, I suppose that it is for me today - I'm rather lethargic today - must be the weather!

Dental Woes

Oh me - I woke up Saturday morning with a tooth doing a dance in my head! I mean it was stomping!! There is nothing worse than it being a Saturday or Sunday morning that a tooth wakes you about 3:00 AM dancing a jig. I hope you never feel it, but believe me, if you do you'll remember what I've said today.

I saw the dentist today - there is a plan of action but he will have to go over it with my medical doctor since there are so many obstacles in the way there, and no many meds. The medical doctor says I'll be back on Lovenox, ugh! It's just part of life though, and this wouldn't be so bad if I'd kept up with my oral health. I had not been in 6 years - and that was when another tooth was dancing a jig!

So I will get all cleaned up, scaled, get some fillings, one tooth pulled, and I'll keep up with it from this point on - good dental health is indicative of good heart health and it is far more important than I've let it be, take care of your teeth!!

Movie Quotes

Have you ever noticed just how much movies will impact your life? Especially that movie that you really liked and have watched multiple times.

In my house, we are constantly using lines from movies in our conversation with each other. In fact, my 18 year old son, Lynn, and I can not have a conversation that one of us does not pull a line from the Friday trilogy of movies. The first "Friday" is my favorite! I've probably seen it 50 times, which is only maybe a third of how many times Lynn has seen it.

"you ain't got to lie" - what I say to him just about every time he comes in and I asked him where he's been.

"dang, we ain't never got nothing" - that's Lynn when he opens the refrigerator door.

"What's up Big Perm, uh, Big Worm?" - that's just the way Lynn says hello to me most of the time.

I have to say this - Lynn and I have gone several rounds of yelling, cussing, screaming, slamming doors, just about everything except throwing punches. But, when it's all over one of us will quote something from Friday and we both laugh.

Should have seen us the other day, we were going down Nolensville Road and saw a man walking who looked just like Ezell from the movie. Hat on cockeyed, etc. everything! We were screaming laughing, "You can't catch no crackhead!"

And, a Friday never passes around here that I don't say, "It's Friday, you ain't got no job, you ain't got s**t to do!".

I say the family that laughs together, stays together!

Yearbook Woes

Remember the class reunion, oh what almost 6 months ago now? I had this grand idea to publish a yearbook - and I anticipated huge sales, etc. Ha ha ha!!

Then lots of things happened, and I've still not finished the yearbook. But I am very close. I finally got most everything in - I'm just working on captions for the pictures now. I sure hope I can take it to the printer this week and get it back before Friday!! Then I will be done!

For sure I will be done with that project - I only have maybe two more until I can really retire. I've still got to finish the history project for which a hard deadline of May 31 has been set. That's good, because obviously for two years left to my own I've not made it a priority.

The only other thing I think is to write up a brief history of my side of town for a cookbook that is being published this spring and submit my recipes to her for inclusion.

Oh yeah, and pick out an apartment, pack, move and unpack, get both of the kids moved and settled. Not much to do between now say April 1? I'll never make that - I'm shooting for June 1 on the moves!

He Got His LIcense!

Well, we passed a huge milestone on Friday. My son passed the written part of the driver's exam on Thursday and was able to get an appointment for the driving portion on Friday, which he passed!! FINALLY!!!

He was difficult to teach, at best. His first statement to me in the van was "Don't tell me anything until I do something wrong!" To which I responded, "That won't work, I am a big woman and it'll take a crane to get me out of her if you turn me over in a ditch". Needless to say, there was more yelling and grunting than I'd ever experienced teaching Renee.

But, at last now he can drive somewhat legally. He has not been added to the car insurance - I don't think I can pay for an 18 year old male - but I plan on him getting a car I've lined up later this week and I'll help him get it started, but insurance will be up to him to pay.

Oscar Today!

Tonight is the Oscars! There has been a time I would have seen everyone of the movies being nominated - no more! In fact, I haven't seen a one of the movies that are nominated!

But, I will watch anyway. I like to look at the dresses, the hair, the jewelry and the shoes, especially the shoes! I always had a thing about shoes - kinda ironic to me since my feet are so messed up I can't wear anything but Birks - but I love cool shoes!

AND, Rob Pattinson is one of the presenters tonight. I'd watch if I hated everything else about the show, just to see him!

New Blog

Hey there constant readers!

Well, I stole that from my favorite author - Stephen King!

I haven't been posting much lately, too much going on, especially with my health.

That being said, I've started a new blog where I've documented quite a bit already about where I'm starting from and my recently diagnosed health issues. I plan to keep both blogs - I'm just so determined to make a difference in my life and want to share what I find that works (and doesn't) for anyone who may face some of the same issues.

You can check it out a www.pathwaytoahealtierlife.blogspot.com. There are and will be a lot of personal reflections, and for the first time ANYWHERE, I've actually posted what I weigh. That may be a major mistake, but I have to face it and hope that my struggle will encourage any or all of you to take control of you own struggle with weigh and related health problems before it's too late!

The Inauguration

Yesterday I sat up in bed until after 12:00 PM watching the inauguration. I should have gone to work much earlier than I did - but then again - things like this only happen once in 4 years and I may not live to see the next one.

It was quite a site! I like the pomp and circumstance of the dignitaries being introduced, especially the former and sitting Presidents and their wives.

I found myself tearing up several times during the ceremony. I can only imagine if I was 20 years older how this would have felt. I remember so many things from the 1960's and 70's that I can recognize and respect that this was truly a HUGE milestone for our country and the world.

And, I truly hope that those who have had qualms or fears will unite with everyone else and truly work to return this country to a time of prosperity and peace!